Big Baby

I have a baby girl. Her name is Cordelia and I love her very very much. Her birth was an amazing experience for me, a learning experience and such an amazing blessing. Her mother did just amazingly, even despite the fact that there were some umibilical issues (every time a contraction would come, the cord would get squished, thus requiring us to move things along on a faster schedule.) I love them both in ways I never thought possible. I am realizing that as much, if not more, as I wanted to be a dad that I am excited to be a family. The three of us (for now) feels so awesome it is hard to describe.

I wasnt squeamish, something I was personally surprised by. I am not bragging as I genuinely expected to be crazy sick if I saw things I didnt want to. The nurse told me, "This is the part where a lot of husbands kind of lose it so if something is wrong you need to tell us." I thought about it for a moment. Mental faculties? Check. Stomach? Good to go. Squeamishness? Nada. "Nope I am good!" and away we went. I dont claim that I really did anything, Candace did all the work. The best I could do was encourage her and hold her hand (when she wanted it) but I am proud of how we did together. She didnt panic, she didnt get mad at me, she told me what she needed and I made sure to ask what she wanted or needed. We talked about it after and it was cool to realize we had indeed come through this OK.

When Cordelia was born I cried. She did too, although I suspect it wasnt because she was overcome by the wonder and absolute surrealism of the situation. I cut the cord, which wasnt as weird as I thought it'd be, like cutting a piece of raw squid or something like that. She cried for a bit but once she was warm she was good.

Here is what I know about my daughter so far:
1) She hates being naked, which as her father I am glad to see. I think it has more to do with being cold though.

2) She enjoys going to the bathroom when she is not wearing any diapers, like when she is being changed. I havent experienced it yet but Candace has... twice.

3) She is very chatty for a newborn... cooing, gurgling, and making lots of cute noises which only endears her to me more as she is officially the only one who sits and listens to my babbling. Maybe we are speaking the same gibberish?

4) She loves to cuddle, which is awesome because I also love to cuddle. We had our first nap together yesterday and it couldnt have been better if we were Ross and Joey.

5) She is a pretty calm little girl. Thus far she has only cried for understandable reasons like, "Hey I am naked and cold!" and "I am feeling peckish!" and even then Candace has been feeding her regularly so that one has only happened once or twice. She is pretty peaceful so far which I think is neat, and not on a "we get to sleep" level but more of a "oh good, maybe she isnt neurotic and anxious like her father" kind of way.

6) She is one hungry little girl. We noticed today her little finger have plumped up a bit but we have already been supplementing with formula a bit because Candace cant keep up with her.

7) She stole my hair! In the last few years I have lost a LOT of hair and apprently it was being saved for a coiff that would make Little Richard blush in shame. I love it though, it really adds to the cuteness factor and it makes me feel very proud when people comment on it.

I am so proud of both my girls. I love my wife in ways I never thought possible and she is still my first love, the one I promised to honour and cherish, to have and to hold and I love that she took one for the team and brought our daughter into the world. I love my little Cordelia Joy too and I am proud of her because I am her dad and that is my job. I love that I get teary just looking at her (who's the baby now huh?) And I cant wait to see what life holds for her... for us.



And to any future suitors, I want you to look at that picture and the look of love in my eyes and realize that if you want a relationship with my daughter, you better have a strong constitution and a good sense of humour because I am gonna make it awful hard on anyone who thinks they have what it takes to take care my little girl... I'm just sayin'